WJTalk - Sports

美式足球的活動結束之後, 緊接的是棒球春訓的準備。 一個是 American Passion, 一個是 National Pastime, 為了這兩個美國人熱愛的球賽, 球迷己互相揶揄幾十年了。

我們兒子小時候打棒球, 我常客串當裁判, 隨後也跟著在高中美足比賽場上服務, 近距離體驗球賽現場的競爭氣氛, 有如英文諺語所說的:  「On the Firing Line」。 其實緊張情況無異, 球迷互相揶揄, 只是老美習慣上的友誼性挑釁, 這也是美國社會輕鬆幽默的一面。

球迷互相揶揄自然成為 Stand Up Comedian 的好材料, George Carlin 有一段雙聲帶的獨白, 可說是棒球與美足爭辯的經典作, 他以高雅的語氣形容棒球, 講到美足時, 則改以粗魯的聲調描述, 非常有趣, 在此摘錄一些與讀者分享, 全文可在下列的 Website 看到。 這個獨白的錄音, 可在 Website 下端點接。

http://www.baseball-almanac.com/humor7.shtml

    "Baseball begins in the spring, the season of new life. Football begins in the fall, when everything's dying.”

Football is played on a gridiron, in a stadium, sometimes called Soldier Field or War Memorial Stadium.”

  “Football is concerned with downs - what down is it?

Baseball is concerned with ups - who's up?”

   “Football has hitting, clipping, spearing, piling on, personal fouls, late hitting and unnecessary roughness.  Baseball has the sacrifice.”

   “Football is played in any kind of weather: rain, snow, sleet, hail, fog...

In baseball, if it rains, we don't go out to play.”

  “Baseball has the seventh inning stretch.

Football has the two minute warning.”

   “Baseball has no time limit: we don't know when it's gonna end - might have extra innings.

Football is rigidly timed, and it will end even if we've got to go to sudden death.”

   “In baseball, during the game, in the stands, there's kind of a picnic feeling; emotions may run high or low, but there's not too much unpleasantness.

In football, during the game in the stands, you can be sure that at least twenty-seven times you're capable of taking the life of a fellow human being.”

光從字面比較難充分感覺球迷互相揶揄的 Funny side, 所以不要忘了聽聽 George Carlin的錄音。